love

i have a speech impediment.
i know exactly what i'm supposed to say and yet i do not know how to express it through words. at least when i'm trying to explain this to others. i slur and stutter, as if english was not my first language, which is it. my heart races and i'm anxious just thinking about trying to get my point across.
im stupid, worthless, and have no sense of direction.
i am ugly. dark cloudy skin, dull brown eyes, and lips that are pale and i do not smoke nor drink excessively.
i would love to be one of the women that could stop a man in his tracks, to hypnotize him with one look. that's what i would love.
even more so, i just want to be the person that someone admires, and wants to love. i want to be the person that matters.